Do you feel like you
reflect on things more than everyone else? Do you find yourself worrying about
how other people feel? Do you prefer quieter, less chaotic environments?
If the
above sound true to you, you may be highly sensitive. The personality trait —
which was first researched by Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D., in the early 1990s — is
relatively common, with as many as one in five people possessing it. Aron, who
has written multiple studies and books on high sensitivity,
including The Highly
Sensitive Person, also developed a self-test (which you can take here) to help you determine
if you are highly sensitive.
While recent
interest in introversion – driven largely by high-profile
publications on the subject, including Susan Cain’s book “Quiet,” –
has brought more awareness to personality traits that value less stimulation
and higher sensitivity, Aron notes that highly sensitive people still tend to
be considered the “minority.”
But “minority” doesn’t mean bad — in fact, being highly
sensitive carries a multitude of positive characteristics. Read on for some of
the commonalities shared by highly sensitive people.
1. They feel more deeply.
One of
the hallmark characteristics of highly sensitive people is the ability to feel
more deeply than their less-sensitive peers. “They like to process things on a
deep level,” Ted Zeff, Ph.D., author of The Highly
Sensitive Person’s Survival Guide and other books on highly
sensitive people, tells HuffPost. “They’re very intuitive, and go very deep
inside to try to figure things out.”
2. They’re more emotionally reactive.
People
who are highly sensitive will reactmore in a situation. For instance,
they will have more empathy and feel more concern for a friend’s problems,
according to Aron. They may also have more concern about how another person may
be reacting in the face of a negative event.
3. They’re probably used to hearing,
“Don’t take things so personally” and “Why are you so sensitive?”
Depending on the culture, sensitivity can be perceived as an
asset or a negative trait, Zeff explains. In some of his own research, Zeff
says that highly sensitive men he interviewed from other countries — such as
Thailand and India — were rarely or never teased, while highly sensitive men he
interviewed from North America were frequently or always teased. “So a lot of
it is very cultural — the same person who is told, ‘Oh, you’re too sensitive,’
in certain cultures, it’s considered an asset,” he says.
4. They prefer to exercise solo.
Highly sensitive people may
tend to avoid team sports, where there’s a sense that everyone is watching
their every move, Zeff says. In his research, the majority of highly sensitive
people he interviewed preferred individual sports, like bicycling, running and
hiking, to group sports. However, this is not a blanket rule — there are some
highly sensitive people who may have had parents who provided an understanding
and supportive environment that would make it easier for them to participate in
group sports, Zeff says.
5. It takes longer for them to make
decisions.
Highly
sensitive people are more aware of subtleties and details that could make
decisions harder to make, Aron says. Even if there is no “right” or “wrong”
decision — for example, it’s impossible to choose a “wrong” flavor of ice cream
— highly sensitive people will still tend to take longer to choose because they
are weighing every possible outcome. Aron’s advice for dealing with this: “Take
as long to decide as the situation permits, and ask for more time if you need
it and can take it,” she writes in a recent issue of her Comfort
Zone newsletter. “During this time, try pretending for a minute,
hour, day, or even week that you have made up your mind a certain way. How does
that feel? Often, on the other side of a decision things look different, and
this gives you a chance to imagine more vividly that you are already there.”
One exception: Once a highly sensitive person has come to the conclusion of
what is the right decision to make and what is the wrong decision to make in a
certain situation, he or she will be quick to make that “right” decision again
in the future.
6. And on that note, they are more upset
if they make a “bad” or “wrong” decision.
You know that uncomfortable feeling you get after you realize
you’ve made a bad decision? For highly sensitive people, “that emotion is amplified
because the emotional reactivity is higher,” Aron explains.
7. They’re extremely
detail-oriented.
Highly
sensitive people are the first ones to notice the details in a room, the new
shoes that you’re wearing, or a change in weather.
8. Not all highly sensitive people are
introverts.
In fact, about 30 percent of highly sensitive people are
extroverts, according to Aron. She explains that many times, highly sensitive
people who are also extroverts grew up in a close-knit community — whether it
be a cul-de-sac, small town, or with a parent who worked as a minister or rabbi
— and thus would interact with a lot of people.
9. They work well in team environments.
Because highly sensitive people are such deep thinkers, they
make valuable workers and members of teams, Aron says. However, they may be
well-suited for positions in teams where they don’t have to make the final
decision. For instance, if a highly sensitive person was part of a medical
team, he or she would be valuable in analyzing the pros and cons of a patient
having surgery, while someone else would ultimately make the decision about
whether that patient would receive the surgery.
10. They’re more prone to anxiety or
depression (but only if they’ve had a lot of past negative experiences).
“If you’ve had a fair number of bad experiences, especially
early in life, so you don’t feel safe in the world or you don’t feel secure at
home or … at school, your nervous system is set to ‘anxious,’” Aron says. But
that’s not to say that all highly sensitive people will go on to have anxiety —
and in fact, having a supportive environment can go a long way to protecting
against this. Parents of highly sensitive children, in particular, need to
“realize these are really great kids, but they need to be handled in the right
way,” Aron says. “You can’t over-protect them, but you can’t under-protect
them, either. You have to titrate that just right when they’re young so they
can feel confident and they can do fine.”
11. That annoying sound is probably
significantly more annoying to a highly sensitive person.
While
it’s hard to say anyone is a fan of annoying noises, highly
sensitive people are on a whole more, well, sensitive to chaos and noise.
That’s because they tend to be more easily overwhelmed and overstimulated by
too much activity, Aron says.
12. Violent movies are the worst.
Because highly sensitive people
are so high in empathy and more easily overstimulated, movies with violence or
horror themes may not be their cup of tea, Aron says.
13. They cry more easily.
That’s why it’s important for highly sensitive people to put
themselves in situations where they won’t be made to feel embarrassed or
“wrong” for crying easily, Zeff says. If their friends and family realize that
that’s just how they are — that they cry easily — and support that form of
expression, then “crying easily” will not be seen as something shameful.
14. They have above-average manners.
Highly
sensitive people are also highly conscientious people, Aron says. Because of
this, they’re more likely to be considerate and exhibit good manners — and are
also more likely to notice when someone elseisn’t being
conscientious. For instance, highly sensitive people may be more aware of where
their cart is at the grocery store — not because they’re afraid someone will
steal something out of it, but because they don’t want to be rude and have
their cart blocking another person’s way.
15. The effects of criticism are
especially amplified in highly sensitive people.
Highly
sensitive people have reactions to
criticism that are more intense than less sensitive people. As
a result, they may employ certain tactics to avoid said
criticism, including people-pleasing (so that there is no longer anything to
criticize), criticizing themselves first, and avoiding the source of the
criticism altogether, according to Aron.
“People can say something negative, [and] a non-HSP [highly
sensitive person] can say, ‘Whatever,’ and it doesn’t affect them,” Zeff says.
“But a HSP would feel it much more deeply.”
16.
Cubicles = good. Open-office plans = bad.
Just like highly sensitive
people tend to prefer solo workouts, they may also prefer solo work
environments. Zeff says that many highly sensitive people enjoy working from
home or being self-employed because they can control the stimuli in their work
environments. For those without the luxury of creating their own flexible work
schedules (and environments), Zeff notes that highly sensitive people might
enjoy working in a cubicle — where they have more privacy and less noise — than
in an open-office plan.
Source – Huff Post
Via – www.bbncommunity.com